Friday, May 25, 2012

Funny Fridays: Mom's New Recipe


(just replace the boys  with my girls.. and this is totally us)



Mom's new recipe

Mom's Brownies Recipe

Remove teddy bear from oven and preheat oven to 375.

Melt 1 cup margarine in saucepan.

Remove teddy bear from oven and tell Jr "no, no."

Add margarine to 2 cups sugar. Take shortening can away from Jr. and clean cupboards.

Measure 1/3 cup cocoa.

Take shortening can away from Jr. again and bathe cat.

Apply antiseptic and bandages to scratches sustained while removing shortening from cat's tail.

Assemble 4 eggs, 2 tsp. vanilla, and 1-1/2 cups sifted flour.

Take smoldering teddy bear from oven and open all doors and windows for ventilation.

Take telephone away from Billy and assure party on the line the call was a mistake. Call operator and attempt to have direct dialed call removed from bill.

Measure 1 tsp. salt, 1/2 cup nuts and beat all ingredients well.

Let cat out of refrigerator.

Pour mixture into well-greased 9x13-inch pan.

Bake 25 minutes.

Rescue cat and take razor away from Billy. Explain to kids that you have no idea if shaved cats will sunburn. Throw cat outside while there's still time and he's still able to run away.

Frosting

Mix the following in saucepan:

1 cup sugar

1 oz unsweetened chocolate

1/4 cup margarine

Take the darn teddy bear out of the @#$% broiler and throw it away -- far away.

Answer the door and meekly explain to nice policeman that you didn't know Jr had slipped out of the house and was heading for the street. Put Jr in playpen.

Add 1/3 cup milk, dash of salt, and boil, stirring constantly for 2 minutes.

Answer door and apologize to neighbor for Billy having stuck a garden hose in man's front door mail slot. Promise to pay for ruined carpet.

Tie Billy to clothesline.

Remove burned brownies from oven

8 comments:

  1. This is great! Great end to my Friday night!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Glad I could help! Have a great weekend.

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  2. I got super hungry fro brownies until I realized this really was about a teddy bear :(( hey by the way I tagged you.. your it go to my blog and get the directions and play along.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Aww...Sorry to get your hopes up Janice. I'll get by your blog asap.

      Delete
  3. haha...cooking and cleaning do not go well with toddlers!
    I am your newest follower from the hop..pls follow back if you can.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I know, right? That's why that joke spoke to me. Following you back.

      Delete
  4. New follower! Looking forward to reading more!
    Hope you will follow back.
    Daisy @ http://trendymomreviews.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks, Daisy. Following you back. Can wait to see what you review next.

      Delete

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