Monday, July 23, 2012

Please...talk to a quiet person today


I'd be the one on the left.........hello?..over here..

Introverts Unite!  I would start a support group but that would involve getting together and  talking... and that would be one quiet meeting. {giggle}

I've always been the quiet one. The only that would sit on the edge of any gathering and just listen. But really I wanted  to talk, wanted to be part of the conversation. I still do. I do have alot to say (durr...I blog now). I know a lot of stuff.   I've tried to make myself more outgoing as I've gotten older....watching other people and trying to be like them. Having kids pretty much forces you to be more outgoing because you have to talk to other mommies to set up play dates and things for the kids to do.  It's still a work in progress for me.

Yes, my idea of a good time is:
- to sit at home and blog
- read
-go for a walk
-organize something
-go have a cup of coffee
- just come to your house, talk  and have a drink.
- crafting something
-hanging out with a small group of people (4-10) at some one's house

I went out a lot in my 20s, again, pushing my introvert envelope but having kids and being a SAHM has put me comfortably where I belong.  I'm probably not going to go back to my drinking/going out every Friday night/hungover story kinda life. 

It's funny how as a quiet introverted  person I always feel  this pressure of  having to be more extroverted as if being who I am  isn't a good thing or not looked at in a good way.  I don't think there's anything wrong with  YOU  if  YOU want to go out every week and have tons of events and tons of friends.  Go. Have a ball , just don't judge me for not wanting to do the same.

There are a lot of times that I don't want to go to certain events or with certain people because  I don't like how I feel  there.  There is always the loud, outgoing person who talks the WHOLE time usually about themselves or  to the one person they're trying to suck up to. The only thing I ever get asked is " How are the girls doing?" Really,  that's all you think I have to talk about?  I try and make conversation with the outgoing ones and it ends up being all about them.  And that's not much fun for me.  Why would it be?

Others have told me, oh just jump in, you have to interrupt us. I don't feel comfortable butting into the conversion (sorry..that's just not me). When I do try that , I feel like everyone is looking at me with the"who does she think she is?" look.  Again, trying to make me like you isn't going to work.

I wonder what my two girls are going to be like:  me or more outgoing.  I feel like K is the awesome outgoing one now and S is the quiet one with the awesome personality that no one gets to see.  No matter who they turn out to be, I want them to be happy like all moms do. I want people to like them for who they are not who they " could " be.


I just want the loud, talkative people of the world to look around sometimes...see the quiet people standing around..come up and talk to us.  You won't believe what we have to say. You might meet someone really cool , learn something really cool or make a really great friend.

Monday
What is the Gunny Sack -Making the world Cuter -Debbie Doo -DIY How Off
DIY Shop - Lines Across My Face -I should be mopping the Floor
Great Fun 4 Kids

Tuesday

How to Nest For Less - Tip Junkie - My Uncommon Slice of Suburbia -The Kurtz Corner
Sugar Bee - Romance On A Dime - Debbie Does Creations - Funky Polka Dot Giraffe
The Winthrop Chronicles


Wednesday
Oopsey Daisy - Thrifty Home - Someday Crafts - Sew Much Ado
- Junk in Their Trunk  - Southern Lovely


Thursday

My rePurposed Life - Beyond the Picket Fence - Somewhat Simple - Live Laugh Rowe
Loving this Crazy Life - Fireflies and Jellybeans - The Shabby Cottage
 The Taylor House
House of Hepworths

Friday

Naptime CraftersStay At Home Nation
Young and CraftyMy Turn(ForUs)
Delicate Construction
Serenity Now
Here Comes the Sun

Saturday

Six Sister's Stuff
Be Different Act Normal
Cheerios and Lattes
Natasha in Oz -Say G'Day

Sunday
Nifty Thrifty Things

57 comments:

  1. I love the princess clique in the opening image. Totally made me laugh. (and by the way, I'm right there with you on your list of favorite things to do)

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    1. They are always getting together like that and kinda ignoring Belle. It's sad. Bummer you are a road trip away :(

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  2. this is why we are friends! so alike!

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  3. I love your profile, Emily. I'm kinda like you, definitely not the outspoken one of the group. It's funny as you get older you begin to get more vocal and willing to speak up, but even today, I just don't enjoy group events unless a close friend or someone I know I can talk to is there. Some people are big group people and some people are small group and individual friendship people. Find good friends and stick together. That's what matters.
    Liz

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    1. So true. At least now I can see that about myself and I don't MAKE myself go to those big group things anymore.

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  4. Your opening line cracked me up! It's obvious that quieter people are funnier! I've had a significant hearing loss over the past five years so it's always quiet in my world. That's okay. I've joined this wonderful world of blogging and reading blogs, and wasting more time that should be allowed on the internet that it makes it all okay! And your description of "walking into a room and not remembering why" I call "pulling a Kellie". I used to have this kitty cat named Kellie and he would walk into a room and just look around and then walk back out. I pull Kellies all the time!

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    1. Aww... It's way cuter thinking of it as a"kellie". It's makes be feel less ditzy and more cute.

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  5. Perfectly said Emily! Clap, clap, clap!

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    1. [bowing] thank you thank you LOL

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  6. Emily,
    I wish you were my neighbor, we could organize till our hearts content, drink coffee and I could actually have a conversation with someone who knows the difference between a blog and twitter. Keep up the good work. Your new follower.
    Karen

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    1. Awww... I know, right? Maybe we could Skype organize? LOL I am following you right back.

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  7. Oh boy do we have a lot in common! Following you via Monday Mingle and would love a follow back. All the best, Monica

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    1. I like meeing new people like me. I'm following you back as well.

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  8. WELL EMILY I LIKE YOU JUST THE WAY YOU ARE! I HAVE A SHOUT OUT TO YOU ON MY BLOG UNDER THE POST "IN HONOR OF 500." AND EVEN THOUGH I CAN TALK, TALK, AND TALK EVEN MORE, I DO LIKE TO SIT BACK AND WATCH PEOPLE QUIETLY TO SEE EXACTLY WHAT YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT IN YOUR POST THE ALL CONSUMING ABOUT ME CONVERSATION HOG. I NEVER WANT TO FALL INTO THAT GROUP I LIKE THE TAKE TURNS AND LETS ALL HAVE A CHANCE. BECAUSE EVERYONE HAS SOMETHING SPECIAL TO SAY :] GREAT POST I LIKE THAT I WAS ABLE TO LEARN A LITTLE MORE ABOUT EMILY, YOUR PRETTY COOL ","

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    1. Thanks, Janice. Blogging wouldn't be the same without people like you. Thanks for the shout out in your post. Congrats on the 500. You keep being strong and awesome.

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  9. What an honest post. The important part is that you know yourself and like yourself just the way you are. It sounds like you do and that makes me like you too--and we haven't even met!

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    1. Thanks, Shannon. That is so nice of you to say. I'm following you back to get to know you better.

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  10. Very well said. I am your newest follower from the nap time review. Hi!

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    1. Same here. Good bitchiness post.

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  11. Right On! Everything you said is so true. I share your list of favorite activities.

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    1. Stephanie. Cool. when can I be over?

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  12. Hi, I'm Shar!
    Your newest follower from the blog hop!

    Great post Emily, a nice way to get to know you. :)

    xoxo ♥ -Shar
    http://sharmartinez.blogspot.com

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    1. Hi Shar. I'm following you back so I can get to know you as well.

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  13. Wow! Great post:) Yeah I think I have been both people but I always liked the quiet one better (and so does everyone else)so don't you change:)
    And I also pray for health and happiness for my children.

    PS I finally published my Versatile Blogger Award:) Just hop over and see it.
    I am running weeks behind on everything, Lol.

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    1. I'm trying not to change. Now if you do manage to get a glass of wine in me..look out. I'm all talkative then.

      Thanks for the shout out on the post. I like that you don't enforce the rules. Yep, that definitely makes you a Grandma.

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  14. too perfect...for a minute i thought you were writing your post about me! i love your pic of the barbies/princesses!
    Rhiannon

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    1. I knew there was a reason why I liked you :) Yep those princesses are always just hanging out ,having little parties outside on the stairs, and talking about all the other toys.

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  15. I know what your are talking about! It really does get better as you get older. I still have a hard time sometimes but I just enjoy being quiet in large groups, if I can get by with it. I have found that the quieter people are usually the people that are "there for you" when troubles come. Being the quiet one is okay!

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    1. Thanks, arkie. I'm coming to like it about myself more and more.

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  16. Great post! You said all the things I've been thinking for years. I, too, love being a SAHM because it really is a great fit for my introverted personality. I get to wear comfy clothes, sing songs, read books (ok, board books, but still!). One thing, though - I don't need more extroverts to go out of their way to talk to me - I'd rather talk to fellow introverts. Introverts rock! :) Hope you're having a great day!
    Kim
    seabrooklane.blogspot.com

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    1. Thanks, Kim. You're right, we do kinda rock

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  17. Lovely post - you must be a closet extrovert!
    I linked in a pizza made with roast chicken leftovers to Live.Laugh. Rowe's linky party. Have a great week.

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    1. Maybe I kinda am...but only if I let you in my "bubble"

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  18. I love this post, Emily...I think that I identify with your "favorite activities" list pretty well. We would probably get along pretty well if you lived closer. I appreciated the truth and honesty. Sooo good! ;)

    Erin

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    1. Wouldn't that be fun? You'll just have to be one of my virtual neighbors then. I'm going to have the best block ever!

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  19. We would totally be friends because that is me to a tee! My husband can talk to anyone about anything but not me. I think sometimes I can come across rude or even snotty because I don't say much in large groups/around people I don't know well.

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    1. I forgot about that part of it all. I think it does look like we are stuck up but we are really just kinda freaking out on the inside.And we just want people to like us like everybody else does. we just need more time to warm up to some people.

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  20. What a sincerely honest and heartfelt post...I understand the "quiet" person ting. I was extremely introverted as a child and have slowly come out of my shell over the years (note my profile confession to dancing on tables :) I'm still more on the quiet side at times, so I do understand. I am a happy new follower to our blog. I really hope you will stop be my place for a visit and maybe a follow back! Angie

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    1. Oh.. you know us quiet people. You get some drinks in us and we are up on stage and singing karaoke, flirting with the whole bar ( my twenties). Yes, the extrovert comes out with wine :) I'm following you back.

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  21. Hi, I followed the link here from Beyond the Picket Fence. I can SO RELATE to all you had to say. I've struggled with being an introvert all my life and though I am not as bad as I used to be, it is still hard to talk to strangers or even casual acquaintances. Only another introvert can really understand. I know I am not the only shy,quiet person on earth, but sometimes it feels like it. I hope you don't mind, but I pinned your post to one of my boards on Pinterest, because it really made my day! ~Helen~

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    1. I can understand. It's so nice to talk to another introvert because the conversations are so easy. And I always welcome a good "pin". thanks, Helen. Have fun in your model T.

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  22. Great post. Yep, I'm an introvert. I've pushed myself through the years to be more outgoing, and I've done many a large-room presentation. It doesn't get easier for me. I'd rather be with my kids. I have 2 girls, one just entering High School who is just like me. Thoughtful, studious, and shy. I'd like to think that it is because I taught my girls to be kind, to think of other people's feelings ... don't all parents? Based on some of the stories they tell me, perhaps not.

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    1. I think us introverts can sometimes be more flexible. Because I know some extroverts that can't be quiet to save their lives LOL. And no, I'm already finding in preschool with K, that parents don't all teach kindness. :(

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  23. Definitely interesting how different people interact isn't it? I can definitely relate to not butting in. It's hard sometimes.

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    1. I know, right? I just can't seem to interject without feeling like a jerk.

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  24. I am probably the loud one who asks about your children... Thanks for the reminder to be more inclusive. However, please do be more forth coming with things that are of interest to you. I found you through Six sisters blog hop...

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    1. It's totally fine to be loud and ask about my kids( I really don't like to do all the talking all the time) but I just can't get a word in to tell them what I've been up too and like :) We can help each other, Julia. BTW...are you from Saint louis or currently live there?

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  25. Hi fellow introvert!
    You're idea of a good time sounds just like mine.
    These days I am so much nicer to myself, and don't MAKE myself do all the things that you're meant to do if you want to look like you're "in".
    I used to stress over it. Past forty now, well, who cares?
    I have my good friends, and the things I enjoy. I can hold an intelligent converstion about a wide variety of subjects, but noise and crowds stress me out, so i tend to avoid them.
    You just be YOU, and don't ever apologise for the way you're made.
    Introverts are awesome.
    x

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    1. Yea, all of us cool people are introverts:) And we like those extroverts too...as long as they don't get into our bubble :) I'm trying to be more in my own skin as I get older but having kids kinda awakens all kinds of feelings that i thought were gone or at least buried.

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  26. Hi Emily - I just found you at Debbiedoo's and I love this post. This is totally me and I relate to everything you said! The funny thing is, I wrote a similar post just this week on my blog. Thanks for writing about this and letting a lot of us know that we are not alone!

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    1. You're right, You really did write something just like this. It's so nice to find other awesome people like me that are finally being who they are.

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  27. I just happened upon your blog when I searched for "being the quiet one" and you pretty much summed up how I feel about being quiet. I have worked very hard at not being shy and would consider myself to be not shy anymore, however in groups I usually don't talk a lot. In my small group tonight someone confronted me about about not having anything to say tonight. This really hurt my feelings/angered me. Sometimes I don't have something to say and if I don't feel like I have something important to add then I'm not going to talk. The other group member made me feel as if I was not getting anything out of our study just because I didnt have anything to add. If someone in the group has already said what I was thinking then I don't necessarily feel the need to repeat the same comment.

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  28. I wanted to add this as well, but my iPad has a mind of its own :). I am glad to see others are like me. Just because I am (we are) quiet doesn't mean that I am not thinking or I don't have a conviction about something. It may just may not be the right opportunity to share.

    Kim

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    1. I'm always glad to find other people like you. I always feel so much more comfortable with other quiet people. I just feel like we get each other. I was all of us introverts lived right by each other and we could meet and talk in person.

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